When Suddenly Life Changes

There are moments in our lives when life shifts completely, and usually, we are not ready for the change. The shift might be a blessing or a tragedy, but it always requires us to show some resilience and flexibility, and it is usually charged with emotions.

There are all sorts of life changes, but here is some common advice to follow when life shifts.

Focus on what you can control.

When our lives change suddenly we can feel disoriented. To gain some normalcy back, focus on what you can handle instead of focusing on what seems out of control.

Practice self-care

When our lives become crazy, it can be easy not to take care of ourselves. We lose our appetite and don’t have the motivation to exercise. You have to take care of yourself to move forward. Be kind to yourself.

Focus on the positive

There are always positives even in the negative changes. Keep a sense of gratitude for what is left.

Make a plan.

I once heard that when a major change happens, you shouldn’t make any drastic decisions for 6 months, but I’m sure that varies depending on the situation.

Seek support.

Big changes can be overwhelming, so don’t be afraid to ask for help in whatever form you need. People are usually glad to lend a helping hand.

Acknowledge emotions.

Keeping your feelings locked inside is unhealthy and will adversely affect you both physically and mentally. You can seek professional help or seek help from family and friends. Often, it helps to just share how you are feeling.

Let’s look at a few examples of when life suddenly changed for someone, and how the person involved handled the situation.

The death of a spouse

The death of a spouse will be devastating in any case, but when it is unexpected it can be even worse. I had a co-worker who lost her husband unexpectedly in a bizarre accident. He was out in the yard cleaning up when a large branch came off of a tree knocking him backward. He hit his head hard against some large rocks and was rushed to the hospital where he died several days later. When I heard the news I looked at my husband and said, “Honey, he was only doing yard work, and in a moment everything changed.” My co-worker eventually came up with a plan to move on and her family has rallied around her to help her.

We all hope something like that will never happen, but we should be prepared. Gather the information that a spouse or other family member will need to know if something happens. My husband has a spreadsheet with everything including expenses, companies we use, and any other important information. Our children know where to find it.

The birth of a child

This is a wonderful moment, but it is also a time that turns your life upside down. Not only will you be sleep deprived, and scared that you are a horrible parent, but you will also receive some of the most outlandish, unhelpful advice you have ever heard. When my daughter had a baby I told her during the first year just make sure the baby is fed, loved, and has a clean diaper. Anything else you manage is a bonus. It is also important to practice self-care and not feel guilty about it. All of the struggles will be worth it.

The Big Break

Are you prepared for that moment when you suddenly have a chance for your dream? Believing you can make it is your first step, but you need to have a plan for how you are going to handle your life when everything changes, and your dream is waiting.

Sudden illness

Do you remember the girl in Georgia, Aimee Copeland who lost several limbs after contracting a flesh-eating bacteria after using a zipline? One moment of normal fun changed everything, but while most people would be feeling sorry for themselves, Aimee has been an advocate for people with disabilities. We can’t always control what happens to us, but we can control how we react.

There are many other life-changing moments, but the advice on top can apply to almost all of them. Be prepared for the unexpected, and I pray that all of those moments are positive ones for you.